If I am going to relocate in 9 months, why date? That is what I am inclined to think. But 9 months is awhile, and I could meet someone who may be in the same boat as me with eventually relocating. I have thought that maybe I should try to just work on me during the next 9 months, but I cannot help my urge to date.

Also, I think about all of the years that I went out of my way NOT to date, and some of the decent me who I could have wound up with. I have tried very hard to suppress the urg to date, but it always returns within a few weeks. Of course, I do not plan on settling, and only want someone where we would both enhance eachother's lives. But the urge to date always comes back. Since I decided to try dating again over two years ago, I have relied exclusively on online dating.

I was new in a big town, recovering from knee surgery, and genuinely shy. I won't go into many details here, but I had some good experiences and many more bad experiences. I have had a way more difficult time with online dating than dating in real life, but maybe that has something to do with being in my 30's. My counselor met her husband on match. com, and swears by it. However, my beloved grandmother who basically raised me recently passed, and she always told me that you cannot meet anyone through that computer.

I am not sure yet, but considering somewhere in Arizona, California, or Washington state. So I will be moving a minimum of 1, miles away. I dunno, I think the best thing to do is date but tell the guys early on that you're going to be moving so they can decide, knowing that, if they want to get serious.

Would you be willing to have a long distance relationship? If not, then I guess you can just date casually until you move. Honestly, your grandmother's opinion of online dating was just technophobia, like my ex's mother expressing bafflement over online banking. It doesn't mean anything. Online dating is just another way to meet people.

It's better than say, meeting people in a bar, because in person all you have to go on is a guy's looks. Online you at least can learn a few things about their personality, and you can see far, far more possible guys than you'll ever meet in person normally, guys who are all themselves looking. It has its own pitfalls, of course, but no more than any other way of making contact.

Your plans at this point are very, very vague, though I can understand not wanting to live in Texas. Anything meaningful you start now is either going to end up long distance, or with forcing yourself to stay even though you don't want to, neither of which is good.

I've done the long distance thing, and it has never worked out for me. I've moved many times in my life, and the only thing that has worked has been dating after I'm settled in a new location. Dating now is a bad idea, but you're going to do it anyway. I've done that as well. You could, in theory, treat it as dating for fun and practice. Do it for the experience now, and the experience in learning how to relate we can always use more of that.

In practice, though, I can't do that. Dating has always been about finding someone for life, and since you're posing the question the way you are, I suspect you think that way as well. So the best you can do is just be self-aware and realize what you're doing and the most likely results. I would recommend waiting 9 months until you are settled in your new location, especially considering the fact that you expect to be moving a minimum of 1, miles away.

I don't see what the point would be in trying to date someone where you are now, if you're just going to move later. Also, since you're in your 30s, I assume you'd be looking for men who are also in their 30s, and most of them are probably settled in their current location or live where they live at this point because they have family or close friends or a good job, all of which they wouldn't want to leave.

I honestly think you would be wasting your time and the guys'. I will add, however, that I am biased. My ex-boyfriend went on an online dating site and sought out dates in the state where we both lived at the time.

That's how we met. If I had known initially as in, as soon as we exchanged messages online that he had always planned to move elsewhere, I never would have bothered dating him.

Now, six years later, I honestly resent him for looking for girls somewhere he never planned to stay. Don't do that to someone else. My situation is similar to yours, yet I am 10 years older than you. I'm I don't want to settle-down in my hometown where I live, because I don't think it is a good place for dating or employment opportunities for both me and possibly a future child. I really need to start dating now, yet I plan on moving about 70 miles away, if I get a job offer there any time soon.

I have been searching for a similar union-wage job, about miles away from me, for about 6 months now, but finding full-time, union job opportunities have proven to be more difficult than I expected.

If I wanted to be employed quicker, than I would have to leave the union, for lower-paying, non-union work, and I don't want to do that, because I have worked and earned my pay raises and better pay. I had different on-line dating profiles for years, yet I had never been on a date through one.

I think most people don't take on-line dating seriously. It is mostly about looks and games. I don't have an online dating profile now, except for meetup, because a woman at my workplace found my profile, so I deleted my profile immediately.

She had always seemed interested in me. I didn't want her getting excited about me, because I wasn't interested in dating her. By Mike , Sunday at AM. By oghopeg , September 5.

By Throwaway , July When you are ready to give consideration to moving the relationship into a deeper level of commitment, I strongly suggest that you obtain an objective third part evaluation of your relationship. A Christian counsellor or a pastor trained in counselling can do this.

IF you have children, do not surprise them with the idea of relocating. This can be very frightening to a child at any age. Tell them that you are giving it some thought and have not arrived at any decision, but want them to be praying about it with you.

Consider the costs! Relocation is a very expensive process in most cases. Some of the costs involved are real estate fees, storage fees, tax consequences see a CPA or attorney , loss of older furniture and appliances that cannot take the move, disconnect and connection fees, restocking of food and consumables, long distance phone bills.

These are just a few of the obvious ones. The reality of either losing or distancing yourself from family and long-standing friendships for you and any children involved should be considered. The decision to make a move should absolutely be one that is developed MUTUALLY and arrived at together — without any pressure.

Real love understands and works through this process; giving and taking to arrive at a decision that is wise and one that each can fully embrace. I believe that the man should make the move in most cases, especially if children are involved with their Mother. There can be good reasons to move the other way, but in most cases I believe that the man making the move is the sensitive and responsible thing to do.

One of the more compelling reasons to not do so is a long-standing career that would suffer financially if he were the one to make the move. A move can be a wonderful occasion for adults as well as children. I suspect that there will always be some grieving in making a move, but if the one grieving had a chance to fully develop the foundation for making such a move, they will quickly move through the grieving process.

Join Christian Singles For Free. She was a flight attendant at the time and her airline a Canadian charter airline starting flying to a nearby airport in the US. This gave us time to get to know one another without anyone having to move. It was definitely God at work. Our long distance relationship lasted 4 years and we have been married for 11 years now. What if you have reacquainted with a person from when you were 16 and I believe its hard for him.

We both have children and he is more stable than I am. I like him and I know he likes me. This has all happened so fast. I found him again so I feel I just dropped it in his lap.

Money is an issue on both ends. When it feels right, it will happen.

By wk , August 2, in Dating Advice. I am a 32 year old swf, who has spent most of her life single- both by choice and by chance. I am finishing up graduate school, plan to leave Texas after graduating in May of , and don't know what to do. If I am going to relocate in 9 months, why date? That is what I am inclined to think. But 9 months is awhile, and I could meet someone who may be in the same boat as me with eventually relocating. I have thought that maybe I should try to just work on me during the next 9 months, but I cannot help my urge to date.

Also, I think about all of the years that I went out of my way NOT to date, and some of the decent me who I could have wound up with. I have tried very hard to suppress the urg to date, but it always returns within a few weeks. Of course, I do not plan on settling, and only want someone where we would both enhance eachother's lives. But the urge to date always comes back. Since I decided to try dating again over two years ago, I have relied exclusively on online dating.

I was new in a big town, recovering from knee surgery, and genuinely shy. I won't go into many details here, but I had some good experiences and many more bad experiences. I have had a way more difficult time with online dating than dating in real life, but maybe that has something to do with being in my 30's.

My counselor met her husband on match. com, and swears by it. However, my beloved grandmother who basically raised me recently passed, and she always told me that you cannot meet anyone through that computer.

I am not sure yet, but considering somewhere in Arizona, California, or Washington state. So I will be moving a minimum of 1, miles away. I dunno, I think the best thing to do is date but tell the guys early on that you're going to be moving so they can decide, knowing that, if they want to get serious. Would you be willing to have a long distance relationship? If not, then I guess you can just date casually until you move.

Honestly, your grandmother's opinion of online dating was just technophobia, like my ex's mother expressing bafflement over online banking. It doesn't mean anything. Online dating is just another way to meet people. It's better than say, meeting people in a bar, because in person all you have to go on is a guy's looks. Online you at least can learn a few things about their personality, and you can see far, far more possible guys than you'll ever meet in person normally, guys who are all themselves looking.

It has its own pitfalls, of course, but no more than any other way of making contact. Your plans at this point are very, very vague, though I can understand not wanting to live in Texas.

Anything meaningful you start now is either going to end up long distance, or with forcing yourself to stay even though you don't want to, neither of which is good. I've done the long distance thing, and it has never worked out for me. I've moved many times in my life, and the only thing that has worked has been dating after I'm settled in a new location. Dating now is a bad idea, but you're going to do it anyway.

I've done that as well. You could, in theory, treat it as dating for fun and practice. Do it for the experience now, and the experience in learning how to relate we can always use more of that. In practice, though, I can't do that.

Dating has always been about finding someone for life, and since you're posing the question the way you are, I suspect you think that way as well. So the best you can do is just be self-aware and realize what you're doing and the most likely results. I would recommend waiting 9 months until you are settled in your new location, especially considering the fact that you expect to be moving a minimum of 1, miles away.

I don't see what the point would be in trying to date someone where you are now, if you're just going to move later. Also, since you're in your 30s, I assume you'd be looking for men who are also in their 30s, and most of them are probably settled in their current location or live where they live at this point because they have family or close friends or a good job, all of which they wouldn't want to leave.

I honestly think you would be wasting your time and the guys'. I will add, however, that I am biased. My ex-boyfriend went on an online dating site and sought out dates in the state where we both lived at the time. That's how we met. If I had known initially as in, as soon as we exchanged messages online that he had always planned to move elsewhere, I never would have bothered dating him.

Now, six years later, I honestly resent him for looking for girls somewhere he never planned to stay. Don't do that to someone else. My situation is similar to yours, yet I am 10 years older than you. I'm I don't want to settle-down in my hometown where I live, because I don't think it is a good place for dating or employment opportunities for both me and possibly a future child.

I really need to start dating now, yet I plan on moving about 70 miles away, if I get a job offer there any time soon. I have been searching for a similar union-wage job, about miles away from me, for about 6 months now, but finding full-time, union job opportunities have proven to be more difficult than I expected.

If I wanted to be employed quicker, than I would have to leave the union, for lower-paying, non-union work, and I don't want to do that, because I have worked and earned my pay raises and better pay.

I had different on-line dating profiles for years, yet I had never been on a date through one. I think most people don't take on-line dating seriously. It is mostly about looks and games. I don't have an online dating profile now, except for meetup, because a woman at my workplace found my profile, so I deleted my profile immediately. She had always seemed interested in me. I didn't want her getting excited about me, because I wasn't interested in dating her.

By Mike , Sunday at AM. By oghopeg , September 5. By Throwaway , July By Charpal23 , July By Jakeissorry Started Monday at PM. By GordonFreeman Started Monday at AM. By boltnrun Started Thursday at PM.

By sysnoot Started Sunday at PM. Yahoo posted a blog entry in News , September Newsweek posted a blog entry in News , September The Guardian posted a blog entry in News , September Joyanima posted a blog entry in Youtube , March Mark Rosenfeld posted a blog entry in Youtube , March Forums Clubs Browse Guidelines Online Users Leaderboard More Activity All Activity Search Our Picks More Videos Breakup Dating Health Infidelity Mental Health Parenting Relationships More Articles More More Everywhere This Forum This Topic Status Updates Topics Pages Blog Entries Products Members.

Start new topic. Recommended Posts. wk Posted August 2, Posted August 2, What do you think about online dating? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options blueidealist24 Posted August 2, Do you know how far you're moving and where to? friendsoulmate Posted August 2, Archived This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies. Go to topic listing. Similar Content Did she cheat or am I overreacting? By Mike , Sunday at AM dating breakup and 3 more Tagged with: dating breakup relationship cheating exgirfriend.

Does he like me? By oghopeg , September 5 crush crushes and 7 more Tagged with: crush crushes teasing mocking relationship boys boy dating friendship. He Still Has Pictures of His Ex-Girlfriend By Charpal23 , July 25 dating girlfriend and 2 more Tagged with: dating girlfriend relationship advice relationship.

Did I come on too strong? Top Discussions this Week. My gf now ex gf didn't believe my proposal was real and broke up. My girlfriends boss is in love with her. My boyfriend keeps making sexist comments. Would be wrong for me to continue this relationship? Drinking while working remotely.

Archived This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies. friendsoulmate Posted August 2, By sysnoot Started Sunday at PM. Should this be cause for concern in my relationship? Drinking while working remotely. It's as easy as being mindful of your own behaviour and adopting steel-proof boundaries.

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